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Hello Everyone and Happy New Year!

Are you working on your New Year’s Resolutions? Or are you like me and just don’t make New Year’s Resolutions because you know you’re gonna eat that cookie anyway?

Although I’m not one to make New Year’s Resolutions I’m definitely a “list maker” and enjoy crossing off each item as I accomplish the designated task. I recently recognized myself in a book I was reading when the writer, while explaining the differences in personalities, said some people will find themselves at the end of the day adding things they did that day to their list just so they can feel a sense of accomplishment. I had to laugh, as I realized I had done that very thing earlier. And yes, there was a great sense of accomplishment!

So now, for all of you “List Makers” and “New Year’s Resolutionists” I have an idea for you: Let’s make a resolution to love better. You may think I mean you should love more, and that would be good as well, but I do mean better.

How can you love someone better? I believe it starts with being available. Do your friends and family know that you are there for them when they need you? Notice I didn’t say “if” they needed you, I said “when” because they will need you. I never imagined I would be brushing my grandmother’s hair for her because the cancer treatment made her too weak to hold a brush. Those were hard times! But I look back on them with gratefulness because that was a time when I could live out my love for her. I could love her better. It was my privilege.

We can also love better by being slow to anger. There is a slogan we used to see on t-shirts that said “When Mama Ain’t Happy, Nobody’s Happy”. Remember that one? Also, Proverbs reminds us that a soft answer turns away wrath, but grievous words will stir up anger. Both are very true and they tell us something. Irritability is contagious!

There was a time when Jim came home from the road, all cheerful and happy, just excited to be home. What did I do when he walked through the door? I told him of all the things that needed to be done around the house and in the office and instead of enjoying a relaxing time with him, I spent the whole time stressing him over the things I was stressing about! What a waste of time! Some of the most frustrating things in my life have been the little things that I just let “get to me” and when I look back on them, I realize much of my frustration could have been avoided. How much better those days would have been if I had been slower to anger!

Another way to love better is to be a better listener. You’ve experienced it. You’re right in the middle of a conversation with someone and you actually watch them begin to tune you out. Frustrating isn’t it? Being ignored will make someone feel very small, as if they don’t really matter. Looking someone in the eye and listening to what they have to say will validate them and let them know you care. So, we can show love better, by listening more, by being a patient listener, and by listening more closely to what the other person is saying.

Today, as I think of my friends and loved ones, I want to love them better. I want to be available to them. I want to be slower to anger. I want to not only be quick to listen, but also to listen more closely. I want them to know without doubt that I care for them.

Tonight, I will start my New Year’s Resolution to love Jim better by watching football with him. I will be available. I will listen as he repeats the plays to me and I will listen closely rather than tune out as the game continues on and on...

What will you do today to BETTER love those around you?

Melissa Brady
http://www.jimandmelissabrady.com

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