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It has arrived. Febtober, as my son, Jim, calls it… his own strange commentary on February, St. Louis style. I’ve always heard if you don’t like the weather in St. Louis, wait five minutes…it will change. Just this morning it was a balmy 73 degrees. By noon there was a fall nip in the air. By 3:00 it was snowing to beat the band and by 5:00 it was 17 degrees with wind gusts of 59 mph. My hubby, Bruce, has just been kind enough to point out that it is now 14 with a wind chill factor of 4 below. Thanks. I’d like to find the guy who tacked that concept onto the forecast…as if it won’t be hard enough to haul myself out into tomorrow’s predicted low.

Sitting here now I can hear the eerie wind howling through the big maple and whistling through the fireplace chimney. It vibrates the windows and heaves the doors in and out as if the house is inhaling and exhaling. I hear the house creaking in ways I never have before and I occasionally pick up the faint scent of wood ash left over in the fireplace from Christmas Eve’s fire. (Yes, I know it needs to be cleaned out.)

Ice pelts the windows and makes me very glad to be inside, warm and dry. I ‘m sure we all take controlled temperature for granted these days, but I can recall a time when it wasn’t the case. I can remember as a kid being buried under heavy quilts and coverlets and literally having to push the covers up to turn over. I didn’t envy my dad, stepping out onto the cold linoleum floor at 2:00 a.m. to stoke the old coal furnace. Some mornings were so cold we could scratch an eighth inch of frost off the single pane windows…on the inside. There are just times you feel chilled to the bone and you wonder if you’ll ever get warm.

I began to think about what happens when we’re faced with bitter cold in the physical world, those days like today when the wind is fierce and threatening and it’s all you can do to walk into the wind and keep your balance. You draw your coat around you and zip all the way up to your neck and then you pull that little-used hood over your head. Gloves are no longer a style statement, but a necessity and any pair is better than nothing…even last summer’s gardening gloves. You put your head down and pull yourself against the wind with all your might. It’s hard to catch your breath. Then you seek shelter, even if it’s temporary. You duck into the corner coffee shop or just be glad to hop into your car…anything to escape the wind and the cold. You may draw your mate or your child close to you and huddle together for warmth. At that moment, all that matters is getting warm again any way you can.

My heart has felt that way before. Has yours? Chilled and icy cold from hurts and hardship and you wonder if it will ever warm up again. I’ve felt as if life’s circumstances were literally sucking the air out of my lungs. It’s hard to maintain focus and balance in your life when the winds of adversity blow so hard against you. I’ve wondered at times what purpose it all served.

Maybe God allows those cold, lonely days and storms to suddenly come our way so we will pull our spiritual garments around us and push forward with determination. He wants us to take shelter in Him. Maybe He just wants to draw His child a little closer. I realize it’s hard to think of it that way when you’re knee deep in sleet, but trust me, God has a way of revealing Himself in our lives. We may not understand His methods and you may not see evidence that He’s working, but as the writer said, “When you can’t trace His hand, trust His heart.”
And that advice is good for any month of the year…even Febtober.

Janice Crow

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